Morgan’s blog

uh... hellloooo...

yeah.  i'm still here.  just because i speak with a quiet voice doesn't mean i have nothing to say.  you can stop speaking over me, really. 

I made myself throw up today, and surprislingly it felt good. I'd eaten too much right before this semiformal and i'd be wearing this tiny little dress... It helped that bekah was right beside me feeling the same way, and we both just kind of looked at each other on the way back from dinner and knew it was the best answer to our cramping stomaches and wilting self esteem. I don't know if she went through with it or not, but I know I did, and I know I felt better for it.

I had my creeper moment for the week. Thought i'd be going to the grocery store and soon enough i'm driving past my ex's car while he's at work. I'm not sure why, cause I was the one who left him. Maybe I was checking the car for damage so i'd know if he was okay? It was two weeks ago tomorrow that we broke up and really he'd deserved it for a long time. But when you have someone like that for so long its really hard to forget, no matter how mad you are.

bmw

An hour ago I was asleep with the TV on.  That's when Carmen came in, laughing loudly with another nameless friend in tow.  It seems like there's an endless stream of them, but I guess it's what happens when you have a roommate in a sorority.  Not that I mind.  And it's her birthday.

So I'm laying in bed chatting with them as they get ready, and I can't help but feel kind of lonely.  After all, they're all dressed up and getting ready to get plastered with other beautiful people on a school night.  Then I think about that statement.  The last time I got plastered with other beautiful people, bad things happened. 

So here's my first step towards a happier life:  don't be jealous, there's a reason why I don't have it.